On Wednesday, GQ published an etiquette guide for men titled “GQ’s 125 Rules for Modern Gentlemen.” Among its rules were things like saying “please” and “thank you,” standing up straight, and taking out your AirPods when speaking to someone. All great (if basic) advice. While teaching cis men manners is never a bad idea, the manifesto had me asking some questions, like, Is olive oil really THAT good of a gift? and Do men think about flowers this often?
But the most concerning tip, to me, is No. 12: “Greet people you know with a single kiss on the left cheek.” GQ adds in a couple caveats, like avoiding kissing someone in a business setting or if you’re meeting them for the first time (did that really have to be said?). In those cases, the magazine recommends a handshake but also says a hug is appropriate if the other person goes in for it first. Huh.
The guide doubles down on the kissing-as-greeting in rule No. 52: “Unless you’re wedged into the middle seat of a booth, stand up to greet people when they arrive. (And, of course, don’t forget to kiss them on the cheek.)” No, please — forget! I’ve never considered myself a prude, but recommending a kiss right out of the gate seems gauche. Have we strayed so far from social distancing that men’s magazines are now advocating for kisses on sight? Sure, the COVID pandemic began five years ago, but I still very much don’t want someone’s potentially germy mouth pressed against my cheek, even if they’re my good friend. Sorry!
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Cheek kisses, at least in my Irish Italian household, are reserved for grandparents and other family members — not the guy my friend’s been casually seeing for two months. I’ll admit there are some bangers on this list, like taking shoes off at home and banning the term body count from your everyday lingo. But GQ really hit the nail on the head with No. 87: “Talk less.” Let’s kiss less, too.
