Glen Powell might be one of Hollywood’s busiest leading men, but can you really make it in this business without a little side gig? With a dog named Brisket, the obvious move for Powell was … a line of condiments? As several of my co-workers pointed out, testing out his sauces means we finally got to taste Glen Powell’s juice (sorry). Anyway, it’s called Smash Kitchen.
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I don’t really have cookouts, so I’m not buying ketchup or mustard on the regular, but Smash Kitchen’s spreads (?) seem quite affordable. Sold exclusively online and at select Walmarts, the eight different condiments — ketchup, hot-honey ketchup, mustard, Dijon mustard, mayo, spicy mayo, BBQ sauce, and hot-honey BBQ sauce — all come in under $5. (For the record, we ordered all eight but tragically the regular mayo was missing.) And they’re all organic, non-GMP, and don’t contain high-fructose corn syrup. Some were better than others. Here are our thoughts.
The Ketchups
“The hot-honey ketchup is good, almost as good as the barbecue sauces. Red sauces for the win.” —Jen Ortiz, deputy editor
“The ketchup is weirdly flavorless? In what world would anyone buy this over Heinz?” —Julia Reinstein, morning blogger
“I think I like the hot-honey ketchup? The texture is mildly scary? Like there’s visible texture, but perhaps I’m just used to overly smooth, overly processed Heinz?” —Danya Issawi, fashion news writer
“Both ketchups are too sweet.” —Danielle Cohen, senior news editor
“The regular ketchup is watery and bland.” —Emily Gould, features writer
“I love this hot-honey ketchup. It’s not something I would usually try, but I’m into it. —Lindsay Peoples, editor-in-chief
“The ketchup was fine, but I’m not a big ketchup girl anyway. The hot-honey ketchup was very good though, and surprisingly, my favorite.” —Brooke LaMantia, editorial assistant
“I would bring this to a cookout this summer.” —Asia Milia Ware, beauty editor
“I love this! I love all of his sauces! I went back for seconds and thirds and I’m actually still thinking about this ketchup. Mind you, I have a very unsophisticated palate.” —Hanna Flanagan, shopping editor
“I don’t like the regular ketchup. There’s a weird edge to it.” —Catherine Thompson, features editor
“If this is on the table, I’d eat it.” —Noelle Lacombe, photo director
“I hate ketchup, and the regular ketchup tastes like ketchup! The hot-honey one is slightly better though.” —Katja Vujić, writer
The Spicy Mayo
“This is flavorless. It’s orange nothing.” —C.T.
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“Greasy. Like almost a lotion texture. And the flavor is bad, too.” —E.G.
“I love mayo and this was so disappointing. I couldn’t taste it!” —B.L.
“There’s no easy way to say this: left an eggy taste in my mouth.” —J.O.
“No thank you to me.” —E.J. Dickson, senior writer
“So this tasted like nothing!!!! I love spicy mayo and was offended by the lack of both spice and mayo flavors in this.” —D.I.
“The mayo has a weird funk (not in a good way).” —D.C.
“Kinda hate it. It is both tasteless and disgusting at the same time, which is an impressive feat to pull off.” —Emily Liebert, writer
“I’m so mad about this.” —J.R.
“As a lover of spicy mayo, I would absolutely dip my fries in this if it was the only option. But it’s not my favorite — the word brash comes to mind for the way the flavors hit my taste buds. The spice had no depth, the mayo was eggy and overly greasy.” —K.V.
The Mustards
“Grey Poupon on notice! This Dijon was very good, Mr. Powell. —Amy Rose Spiegel, features editor
“The Dijon was not bad! Go off, Glen. The yellow mustard is indeed mustard.” —J.R.
“This!! This was the best sauce. Shockingly good on a fry.” —D.C.
“I actually loved the Dijon is strong! It’s really flavorful. As for the yellow mustard, as my colleagues said, it tastes like mustard. Which I happen to love! Another winner for me.” —K.V.
“The yellow mustard was yellow! It tasted like mustard! Do we need this? Probably not!” —E.L.
“I hated it, but I hate mustard, so.” —B.L.
The BBQ Sauces
“My dad is from Alabama. I have no further comment.” —L.P.
“McDonald’s-y (complimentary).” —J.O.
“It tastes cheap, meaning I love it. I’d do up some chicken in this” —A.R.S.
“I had low expectations, but I liked both of the BBQ sauces. They’re both sweet and tangy without being too smoky. Feels like something you’d get at a fast-food restaurant, in a good way.” —Carol Lee, beauty writer
“Way too sweet.” —E.G.
“It tasted like synthetic BBQ sauces. I felt like I was a teenager again in Times Square at Dallas BBQ.” —A.M.W
“I liked the hot-honey one, but I don’t think I’d buy it over, say, Chick-fil-A sauce (I’m gay, I can say that).” —B.L.
